Thursday, November 6, 2008

Two-Step in Time

There's a rhythm & flow to all things. Days come and go, weeks and years pass. It is a basic concept we all come to learn and accept...
not this time!

After I put Grace down for her nap today, I started going through the clothes on the kitchen table that were graciously handed down to us from Andy's younger sister. Her girl has grown out of them, and isn't expecting any brothers or sisters in the near future. These clothes have sat on my kitchen table since September. Yes, I'm a bad housekeeper. I've been meaning to pack away the ones that are too small or too light for our cold winters. Slowly I went through the piles (Grace's own clothes, freshly laundered, as well) and felt very sad as I folded and placed tiny onesies, swaddle sacks, and jammies in the plastic tote at my feet.

My baby is growing up... this is profoundly depressing to me. I knew she was going to grow up, that life would march on, but I miss that tiny bundle of easy-to-please, custard-smelling, sleeping 20 hours out of the day newborn. I still remember her snuggled against my chest at the hospital, still so new and miraculous. I miss those first moments fiercely.

Don't get me wrong, though. Grace's smile and laugh is the best, but I can't help but feel that time is falling away too fast. Why can't they stay a tiny newborn for just a little longer than they do?


Tara said...

yeah, it's really too bad they have to grow up sometimes. but they only get cuter and cuter. :)

~Jenn Danza~ said...

You are not alone mom. You are not alone! I am putting away the 3Ts here and am balling. I can't believe how they really grow.