Grace and the Pearls of Tyranny

It's happened. Grace has come face to face with the Pearls of Tyranny... aka TEETH.
Andy was the first to notice them when he was giving her some medication for her RSV on Sunday. He called me over & I felt her gums. HOLY COW SHE ATE RAZORS! Andy & my friend Jazz say they can both see them coming in, but all I see is her sore little gums. I picked up some chamomilla, for teething and irritibility, and she did really well on it yesterday till Andy got home. Then she turned into a little beast.
She also started sitting up all by herself, unsupported, in the last two weeks, and she's getting really close to crawling. Heaven knows she seems to zip around the living room when we're not looking. She is phenomenally good at rolling. She sort of reminds me of Disney's Stitch when Lilo first brings him home.


I got the bandage taken off my ear last Friday & it looks GREAT! The doctor also said I can sleep on my left side as long as I wear a headband. The camo set I bought is very comfortable, so we're all set there.
I should really clean the livingroom, but erm.. Aunt Flo decided to visit for the first time since Christmas & she is being a bear, and yet it's such a nice day outside. I should probably just take some drugs, do what housework I need & whisk my daughter off to the park before she eats the James Bond movie she's got in her hands right now.
I admit Daniel Craig is yummy, but I doubt Andy would be happy to find our movie has become Grace's latest teething toy.

P.S. Happy St. Patrick's day! Maybe I should steal a little cash from hubby's account to buy us a decent Irish dinner & teach our girl all about her heritage... or at least give her some bangers & champ for supper :)

Post-Op Update

Just wanted to let you know that my surgery went well. I even got to see my friend Kathy before surgery. She was attending to a back surgery, but at least I got to see her. They called me back shortly after I posted yesterday morning. My anesthesiologist was hilarious, and so was the nurse that got the IV in my arm.
Surprisingly, I'm not in nearly as much pain as I thought I would be. My ear stings from time to time, but so far it hasn't been anything more painful than the keloid constantly was. We'll see how I feel after all the drugs wear off. I've only had to take 1 lortab so far, and will probably take another one before bed just to be on the safe side. No one wants to wake up screaming in sudden pain.
The doctor put a clamp over my ear. It's kinda like a porous, melted candle. I get to have it taken off next Friday. In the meanwhile, I can't sleep on my left side, and have to be exceptionally careful around the clamp. The doctor said it could pop off if I wasn't careful, and keeping pressure on the wound is the key to keep Cleatus from coming back.


Anyway, I want to express my thanks to my friends who have shown love and support. Hubby has been very supportive and taking good care of Grace, and so have friends Sam & Jazz. I'm so lucky to have them in my life.
Also, for whatever reason, Grace keeps laughing at me.

Bon Voyage, Cleatus!

Good morning! It's 7 in the morning & I'm sitting at the hospital on a shared computer. I'm having my keloid removed today. They told me to be here at 6:30, but we got here earlier than that, so I don't know when they'll call me back. Already I've had my finger stuck, peed in a cup, and been identified that I am, indeed, myself... as opposed to later when I may not be myself, but a more goofy version of myself thanks to copious amounts of anesthetics and other drugs. Whee!
Grace is safely asleep at home with one of my best friends, Jazz. I didn't want to disturb her schedule. She doesn't really need to be here anyway. There's not a whole lot to do. She has been sick lately, anyway, with a mild case/form of RSV. I think she's getting better. We're doing everything we can. She has remained chipper the whole time. It's suprising how many kids are here at the hospital for surgery. There was a very tiny 2 month old going in for hernia surgery, and several other kids for other procedures. It makes me grateful that Grace hasn't been in a similar situation.
Andy is sitting closeby working on the company laptop so he doesn't lose hours. At least he's here. Gotta afford the enormous surgery bill somehow, right?
So I'm just sitting here waiting. I had my hair cut super short yesterday so it stays out of the way during the procedure, and recovery. I'm looking forward to saying "Bon Voyage, Cleatus! And please don't come back"
And can I just say that I'm getting hungry? I don't like how they make you fast. I haven't had anything to drink since 11 last night, and no food either. Can I just tell you how hard it is to be a diabetic & not be allowed to drink anything? I mean I'm part camel, y'know! The thirsty part.
So I can't say anything else really. I went to bed at 1a and got up at 5a, so I'm ready for a hardcore anesthesia-induced nap.
Off to spend a few minutes with hubby.
Hope you have a great day! Can't wait to be sober again & put up some post-op pictures.

FAREWELL, CLEATUS, BANE OF MY SELF ESTEEM!

Cleatus & The Slacker

So I've been lame about doing updates, cuz I felt there wasn't a whole lot to update about.
Grace turned 6 months old on Jan 9... my mom's birthday, which I completely forgot to call her for *bangs head on desk*. I'm sure I would've realized by evening what day it was. I mean, REALLY! She's my MOM for cryin' aloud.
Grace seemed to enjoy her first Christmas, and likes the baby grand daddy bought her. We are still trying to teach her to smack the keys instead of grabbing them.



Mom came & visited us for Christmas, and tried to take Grace home with her via stowaway carry-on:



At Grace's 6 month checkup, the pediatrician cleared her for baby food! We have been having a lot of fun with it. I call her my lump of clay cuz I can feed her just about anything & she doesn't care. The only things she doesn't seem to like are the meat & broth baby foods and carrots. Carrots are the only thing she makes a face at. It's not the scrunched up yucky food baby face, but she kind of looks at me with disdain "Ugh... do I HAVE to eat this, Mom?"

She also successfully rolled from her back to her tummy last Thursday. I was very happy. She figured out tummy to back in December, so the circle is complete. She also does what my husband calls a "happy dance". It's very funny and cute. I will be sure to post a video of it at the end of this post. She was also blowing raspberries pretty consistently for a while, but she seems to have stopped for now. Those were pretty funny too.

As a final note, I went to see an ear/keloid specialist yesterday to have a very ugly mass of tissue removed from the top of my left ear. I call the keloid "Cleatus", cuz it's the ugliest name I can think of (Sorry to those of you reading this blog who are named Cleatus). I saw the doctor last year for it, but the treatment he suggested was going to be too dangerous for Grace who I was pregnant with at the time. The keloid has continued it's uncontrollable growth, and I was thrilled to hear Dr. Riddle tell me "It's got to come off, hon". I was so squirrely all of yesterday evening. They are going to call me this morning to set up the surgery. Man, I can't tell you how excited I am. I've never been this stoked to go under the knife before! LOL.
Consequently, would anyone like to take care of me and the baby that day? Hubby's can't really take any more time off, and I'll be really fun hopped up on all those pain killers. I hope I get demerol again, that stuff is great! Last time I had it, I asked my hubby the same question like 12 times throughout the day. I will most likely be getting my hair cut super short again for the surgery, to help avoid getting shaved.

Merry Christmas!

I know it's been ages since I posted last, but now I have something to share and a moment free to share it.
So we had our first professional pictures as a family done today. I just wanted to share some with you... but first, I'd like to set the mood. The following is a quote from the TV cartoon series Family Guy:

"You all think Christmas just happens. You think all this goodwill just falls from the freakin' sky, WELL IT DOESN'T! IT FALLS FROM MY HOLLY JOLLY BUTT! So you can cook your own darn turkey, wrap your own stupid presents, and hey, while you're at it YOU CAN ALL RIDE A ONE HORSE OPEN SLEIGH TO @#$&! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!"





We now return you to our regularly scheduled programming! *Burl Ives croons Christmas tunes*


Our little dolly, Grace Anne, already 5 months-- HOLY SMOKES!


"Wait... what do you mean there's a fat man that comes down people's chimneys?!"


I love mah hubby!


After the reindeer suit, Grace was D-O-N-E and we were both trying to get her to calm down, which resulted in some suprisingly sweet & tender pictures:



Thanks again for letting me share with you. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Two-Step in Time

There's a rhythm & flow to all things. Days come and go, weeks and years pass. It is a basic concept we all come to learn and accept...
not this time!

After I put Grace down for her nap today, I started going through the clothes on the kitchen table that were graciously handed down to us from Andy's younger sister. Her girl has grown out of them, and isn't expecting any brothers or sisters in the near future. These clothes have sat on my kitchen table since September. Yes, I'm a bad housekeeper. I've been meaning to pack away the ones that are too small or too light for our cold winters. Slowly I went through the piles (Grace's own clothes, freshly laundered, as well) and felt very sad as I folded and placed tiny onesies, swaddle sacks, and jammies in the plastic tote at my feet.

My baby is growing up... this is profoundly depressing to me. I knew she was going to grow up, that life would march on, but I miss that tiny bundle of easy-to-please, custard-smelling, sleeping 20 hours out of the day newborn. I still remember her snuggled against my chest at the hospital, still so new and miraculous. I miss those first moments fiercely.

Don't get me wrong, though. Grace's smile and laugh is the best, but I can't help but feel that time is falling away too fast. Why can't they stay a tiny newborn for just a little longer than they do?

Guilty as Charged

Last night was one of the first times I felt guilty as a parent.

If not for what little common sense I have, I would not hesitate to wallow in my self pity and think "Gosh, I must be the worst parent EVER."
But I am almost positive there has to be at least one parent out there who is worse at this game than I am.

For the first 3 months of my daughter's life, I've managed a happy, healthy baby, and had the good fortune to think to myself, "Yay! I don't entirely suck as a parent". Afterall, you can't entirely suck if your kid is still alive & kicking, right?

First, I want to be upfront and say how adamant I am about breastfeeding my children. I wanted to exclusively breastfeed Grace until she was at least 6 months old. Unfortunately, my supply has been dropping without any reason I can think of, and my poor baby has slowly been starving. I try to tell myself that I've always been able to feel her ribs, and not be entirely paranoid over it. I was just so determined to keep breastfeeding her exclusively and not give in to the urge to supplement with a bottle of formula.
So, you can imagine my dismay when I gave in to that urge last night.

I've been sick for a few days now, with a low grade fever, and last night I was dehydrated, and "the girls" were high and dry. The fight to get Grace to sleep at night has been gradually been growing more and more tremendous, mainly because she's so hungry I think. The last few nights she was waking up every hour, which is how I got sick in the first place (you try going two nights with minimal sleep at the start of cold & flu season and see how healthy you stay, lol).
Usually she's awesome about sleeping straight through the night, but it's gotten to the point where hunger is overriding that habit. She even started refusing naps.

So I broke down last night & gave her a bottle of formula. I felt terrible about it, but I wasn't about to let her go to bed hungry another night. Both Andy & I needed rest. Andy's been such a champ this week about taking care of two babies, but I think it's starting to get to him.

The decision to supplement, and with what, wasn't easy. I called the after hours pediatrician hotline and asked them what formula would be best to do the deed with, keeping Grace's reflux in mind. They suggested the soy based sample I had on hand at first, but weren't entirely sure. I had several sample cans from the hospital-- two cans of Enfamil with Lipil, and two cans of Similac, one of them soy based.
Eventually the nurse called us back to tell us which one specifically to get (something AR), but to stick with one formula for at least a week before switching to see how Grace would react to it.

So far she seems to be handling it well, she even slept in till 8:15 (booyah!). I was able to pump 5 ounces of breastmilk out this morning, so that was a good start. However, I only managed to get 2 ounces at the next feeding, so I made another "I'm a horrible parent" decision. I combined it with two ounces of formula for a four ounce bottle. I guess some breastmilk is better than none, right?
At feeding #3, my supply is found wanting again, so I'll be repeating the process when Grace gets up from her second nap.
Holy cow... her second nap... I can't remember the last time she slept twice in the same day!

As for a solution to the low supply problem, I've been taking fenugreek capsules and More Milk Special Blend. More Milk tastes & smells like Satan's behind... not that I personally know what that smells like, but it really reeks. I haven't been taking it this week because I've been sick, and had a hard time stomaching food for a day or so, so I am waiting until I'm better to get back on the stuff.
I guess if you're a huge fan of intense black licorice, you'd probably go for it, but I think it's as nasty as spinach, coleslaw, and other commodities I tend to gag on.